Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Week 13....

Okay I'm back in the game. I had the break and it was really just what I needed.

I was just really feeling a lot of pressure to lose weight, to post good things every week, to get those buttons and I never really had my heart into it. Whether or not my mind was into it is yet to be decided. I really felt embarrassed that I am right back where I started two years ago. And that I even got that way to begin with! I am embarrassed that it's only 40 pounds! And I cannot get rid of it, I'm embarrassed that I am worried that I will not be able to lose weight. Silly isn't it? But I am worried that maybe I will never get to a happy weight. I am really scared of failing. And it's not just about weight that I have come to realize that I am sacred to fail at anything. But with losing weight it is souly on my own shoulders. No one else has anything to say about what I put into my own mouth or if I workout or not.It's completely up to me. It's really been holding me back in my life, a silly fear of failure. I just need to be more knowledgeable of that fact and ask for help. And not to sweat the small stuff!!

SO failure is NOT an option for me. I do know that there will be days when I don't do good at all and I just want to quit. The thing is to acknowledge that I had a bad day and go on. Which is why I named my blog as such "one day at a time" I just seemed to of forgotten. Oh and I am going to try my hardest to post everyday, it really does help to have you all. :) Thanks...

I am also going to make the next 14 weeks really count. I'm not going to live forever and I need to make what I do have the best possbile life ever. I don't want to have said well she eat good things...I want more out of life.

2 comments:

Heather said...

I think you have a great attitude, and Im glad you are back in the right mindframe. I agree, its hard to always be positive and its embarrassing sometimes too (I hate posting when I gain). I know you are going to do this!

Cammy@TippyToeDiet said...

A very wise man told me once, "The only ones not making mistakes are the ones not doing anything." At least you're trying. You're fighting for yourself. That's HUGE.